Prize draw details*

Win a three-bedroom Surrey house*

The totally over-polished prize detail page for Megadinghy's fictional house offer, supposedly funded by British taxpayers. Lawn stripes included. Reality not included.

The alleged dream

Leafy Surrey living, with all the imaginary admin paid upfront*

Step inside the prize nobody can win: a spotless three-bedroom family home with a driveway, a garden, and enough fictional council paperwork to stun a planning officer at twenty paces.

3Bedrooms*

1Overconfident driveway*

£0Actual prize value*

0Winners, because it is parody*

*No house exists, no draw is operated, British taxpayers are not paying for anything here, and nobody can win anything from this page. It is a satirical exaggeration of online offer pages, public-sector outrage, and suspiciously shiny marketing promises.

Return to booking* Official routes

Estate-agent style view of the fictional Surrey prize house

Estate-agent energy, comedy-grade small print

Featuring tasteful brickwork, suspiciously perfect hedges, and the kind of driveway that looks like it has never met a bin day.

Prize terms

How do I qualify?

You do not. The entire promotion is a joke. The only qualifying action is noticing the asterisk before the asterisk notices you.

No paymentRequired or accepted for the prize

No drawConducted, hosted, or administered

No propertyTransferred, reserved, or implied

No adviceImmigration, legal, housing, or financial